What's In A Name?
Hmm, apparently I’m in the mood for clichés… anyway, for those few (very few) readers I have, you might notice the name change for this site. Well, when I first created this site, it’s main purpose was to act as a place for me to host information about my various projects. As a result, I just picked the first lame-ass name that came to mind. But, as my site has grown, I quickly realized that a name change was inevitable. And that day has finally come.
But why “The ‘B’ Ark”? Well, my fellow Douglas Adams fans will recognize the name of that fateful ship launched from Golgafrincham, packed with its telephone sanitizers, marketing personelle, and other “undesirables”, which ultimately crashed on Earth and populated the planet with our forebearers. Thus, the name is a little nod to one of my very favourite authors (who died far too soon). It also seems appropriate that, had bloggers existed at the time Hitchhiker’s was written, they probably would have been included on the “B” Ark. And of course it seems hardly a coincidence that “B” is for blogger and “B” is for Brett! So multilayered…
Review: The Twelve Chairs
Review of The Twelve Chairs by Ilya Ilf & Yevgeny Petrov (9780810114845)★★★★(https://b-ark.ca/ogI46I)Ostap Bender is an unemployed con artist living by his wits in postrevolutionary Soviet Russia. He joins forces with Ippolit Matveyevich Vorobyaninov, a former nobleman who has returned to his hometown to find a cache of missing jewels which were hidden in some chairs that have been appropriated by the Soviet authorities. The search for the bejeweled chairs takes these unlikely heroes from the provinces to Moscow to the wilds of Soviet Georgia and the Trans-caucasus mountains; on their quest they encounter a wide variety of characters: from opportunistic Soviet bureaucrats to aging survivors of the prerevolutionary propertied classes, each one more selfish, venal, and ineffective than the one before.
Well, I finally finished reading The Twelve Chairs by Ilf and Petrov… in a word, surprising. The translation from Russian to English is, to say the least, rough at times; I’m sure there are many Russian cultural jokes and references that I simply have no hope of understanding. But overall it was fairly entertaining, as long as you’re happy reading the odd passage with the knowledge that you’ll never really understand it’s meaning.
The story revolves around the two main characters, Ippolit Matveyevich Vorobyaninov, a former nobleman, and Ostap Bender, who is essentially a crook. The setup is simple: just before Vorobyaninov’s mother-in-law dies she reveals that she has hidden a cache of jewels in one of her twelve dining room chairs, which has been taken by Soviet authorities. Vorobyaninov is then joined by Bender, and the two of them go on a cross-country search to find the chairs and recover the jewels. Along the way, in order to fund their journey, Bender comes up with some rather ridiculous schemes in order to con people out of their money.
Continue reading...Mostly Male
So, I was browsing around on Men Who Knit, a community site for male knitters (yes, apparently there are enough of us that a dedicated website is warranted), when I came across a few posts that I absolutely had to share. Someone came across a publication called “Brunswick Mostly Male” and posted some pics from patterns therein. And trust me… the name fits:
I think the jumpsuit is my favourite. I gotta gets me one of those!
ARGH!
I’m writing this entry prematurely, mainly because I’d already written the one for today, and this story needs to be told. At least, IMHO.
Okay, so, first some background. Yesterday our DVD remote mysteriously stopped working (well, not mysteriously… it had been slowly failing for a while). I tried the obvious and replaced the batteries, but it made no difference. Conclusion: remote is fux0red. Then, today, for some reason, the cable box remote seems to no longer be working properly. WTF?? Lenore then points out that this seems to coincide with my network noodling (as earlier blogged), and so I start to get a little paranoid. Did I wire something wrong? Is there IR interference being generated?? Because, if so, that means heat source, and heat source equals bad.
So, I begin the investigation. First, I test the remote at various angles. Slowly, I discover that it will only work when I’m standing in a certain position. So I move my body, but maintain the remote position. Doesn’t work. Yup, definitely interference. To verify, I shift the position of the cable box, and then fire the remote straight at it. Works perfectly.
At this point, rather than doing the smart thing and further investigating, I decide to begin testing solutions. I disconnect my networking job. No help. I disconnect the telephone line. Still no help. I disconnect the laptop cable. I unplug my Palm recharger. Nothing. Now I start to get more paranoid. Is it the wiring in the walls?? In the hopes that it’s not, I start closing blinds on the main floor. Maybe external interference?? It seems unlikely, but you never know… but, still nothing.
Now things get desperate. I need to narrow down the interference (this after 20 or 30 minutes of frantic confusion)! So, I position my body further from the TV, and find the position where the remote starts working. Then I step further back, repeat. Then I duck down while pressing buttons on the remote. Stops working. Stand up. Starts working. Duck. Works. Stand doesn’t work. What the heck?!? I’m definitely blocking something! So I look behind me… what could it be?!? I check through the kitchen, but there’s nothing obvious there, either. I start pondering cutting holes in the walls.
And then, I glance at the dining room table, and I notice something seemingly innocuous: the busted DVD remote control is on the table. Facing the TV. With brand new batteries in it. So I decide to turn the remote around. And sure enough, the cable box remote works perfectly. At this point, I yanked the batteries out of the DVD remote in a rage and slammed them down on the table… and what’s Lenore doing? Giggling. Giggling! While I’m trying to save our house from burning down. Well, damnit, the next time you’re suffering from mysterious IR interference, you can just stuff it!