Posts in category 'funny'

  • Pants Suits For Everyone!

    1 min read

    Some of you may remember my entry about the infamous Knitted Pants Suit. I still consider this one of my all-time favorite knitted items, and for the longest time, I bemoaned the lack of a pattern from which I could replicate this masterful work of art. Well, a while back, I decided to send a private message to the poster of the entry where I first encountered this gem (the second link in the aforementioned blog entry), in the hopes that I might acquire the pattern and perhaps create one of my own… you know, to wear around the house, or for one of those wild nights out for which Lenore and I are truly infamous.

    Well, as it happens, not a week or two later, I got a response from the individual in question. Yes, he did have the pattern. And yes, he would get me a copy! And so it was that I came into possession of three PDFs which will enable me to create my very own knitted pants suit.

    Of course, it would seem unfair to keep this pattern to myself (it’s bad enough I’ve held on to it this long without sharing it with the world), and so I offer it up here (yes, I realize this is copyright infringement, but I just hope Brunswick will understand). Heck, maybe myself and any other interested knitters could each create our own renditions of this masterpiece, that we may then compare our interpretations, and, in the process, enrich the world with the knitted pants suits that it so woefully lacks.

  • ARGH!

    2 min read

    I’m writing this entry prematurely, mainly because I’d already written the one for today, and this story needs to be told. At least, IMHO.

    Okay, so, first some background. Yesterday our DVD remote mysteriously stopped working (well, not mysteriously… it had been slowly failing for a while). I tried the obvious and replaced the batteries, but it made no difference. Conclusion: remote is fux0red. Then, today, for some reason, the cable box remote seems to no longer be working properly. WTF?? Lenore then points out that this seems to coincide with my network noodling (as earlier blogged), and so I start to get a little paranoid. Did I wire something wrong? Is there IR interference being generated?? Because, if so, that means heat source, and heat source equals bad.

    So, I begin the investigation. First, I test the remote at various angles. Slowly, I discover that it will only work when I’m standing in a certain position. So I move my body, but maintain the remote position. Doesn’t work. Yup, definitely interference. To verify, I shift the position of the cable box, and then fire the remote straight at it. Works perfectly.

    At this point, rather than doing the smart thing and further investigating, I decide to begin testing solutions. I disconnect my networking job. No help. I disconnect the telephone line. Still no help. I disconnect the laptop cable. I unplug my Palm recharger. Nothing. Now I start to get more paranoid. Is it the wiring in the walls?? In the hopes that it’s not, I start closing blinds on the main floor. Maybe external interference?? It seems unlikely, but you never know… but, still nothing.

    Now things get desperate. I need to narrow down the interference (this after 20 or 30 minutes of frantic confusion)! So, I position my body further from the TV, and find the position where the remote starts working. Then I step further back, repeat. Then I duck down while pressing buttons on the remote. Stops working. Stand up. Starts working. Duck. Works. Stand doesn’t work. What the heck?!? I’m definitely blocking something! So I look behind me… what could it be?!? I check through the kitchen, but there’s nothing obvious there, either. I start pondering cutting holes in the walls.

    And then, I glance at the dining room table, and I notice something seemingly innocuous: the busted DVD remote control is on the table. Facing the TV. With brand new batteries in it. So I decide to turn the remote around. And sure enough, the cable box remote works perfectly. At this point, I yanked the batteries out of the DVD remote in a rage and slammed them down on the table… and what’s Lenore doing? Giggling. Giggling! While I’m trying to save our house from burning down. Well, damnit, the next time you’re suffering from mysterious IR interference, you can just stuff it!